Dear Canada,

How's things there? I've been sooo busy lately. Sorry I haven't had time for a visit.

Listen, if Dubya gets re-elected in November, can I move in with you? I know he may not seem THAT bad at first (and it was kinda cool when he was handing out three hundred dollar checks to everyone), but after you've lived with him for a while, you really regret it.

Plus, he won't stop pissing off the neighbors.

Let me know what you think.

Thanks,

Pat

P.S. Thanks for bringing Tim Hortons to Rhode Island, eh?