Baby Farts-a-Lot

(or, "Join me, and together we will rule the Galaxy as Farter and Son")

There's two kinds of people in this world: uptight, humorless ninnies; and people who think farts are funny.

When babies are really small (like, less than six months), they have a tough time with gas. They don't really know how to fart yet. You have to lie them on their backs, bend them at the waist, and kinda roll their legs from side to side to help them work it out. Little Man used to wake up in the middle of the night screaming. And who was the best at helping him get the farts out? Yup. His dad. "The Fart Whisperer" they'd call me. I have a deep understanding of having gas.

Now, Little Man just lets loose whenever he feels like it. And I laugh and laugh. I probably shouldn't be encouraging it at the dinner table, but other than that, it's fine.

But a few years down the road, poor Jen doesn't stand a chance. She's going to be getting it non-stop at home.