One of the guys at work brought his 4 year-old in for the afternoon. I took a 5 minute break from work for to play ball with him in the hallway.

Now, the dad is a big Yankees fan. Overrated Yankees third basemen (and known purse-wearer) Alex Rodriguez had made two errors the night before.

So I tell the kid, "Say 'Dad, watch this! Just like A-Rod.'"

Then I bounce the ball over his head.

I'm still laughing at that one.

It's not a Sprint, it's a Marathon...

We went to a wedding in Marathon, NY a few weeks back (population 1107 - there's easily more cows than people). While unpacking the car Friday night after checking in to the hotel, I realized I had forgotten the shoes I was going to wear to the wedding. All I had with me for shoes was the stinky sneakers I had been wearing for the whole drive. The wedding wasn't until one o'clock Saturday afternoon. I figured we'd try to find something in the morning.

Now, at home, running out and picking up a pair of shoes on short notice is no big deal. Within 15 minutes of where I live, there are literally hundreds of shopping options (and three different Targets). In the middle of Central New York, it could be 45 minute drive to the nearest thing approaching a town. In many of these little farming villages, there isn't even anything that's been built within the last 50 years other than the gas station (and maybe a drug store). Large commercial shopping centers are few and far between. After that, it's just hills, cows and wide open spaces.

We were lucky enough to find a small men's clothing store that carried shoes in the town we were staying in, which lead to the following exchange:


"Where are you people from?"

"Rhode Island."

"Long Island?"

"No. RHODE Island."

"Rutland, Vermont?"

"No no. RHODE. ISLAND. The state."

(Thus further proving my theory that native Rhode Islanders never leave Rhode Island...)

We bought the shoes and moved along. We made it to the wedding with plenty of time to spare.
When I saw the group gathered outside the door drinking and smoking, I suddenly realized that it was not the kind of wedding crowd that I was used to. It was more of the cowboy hats and Lynyrd Skynyrd t-shirt crowd. The only collared shirts being worn were the plaid flannel kind.

Now, I'm not judging these people... It's just different from what I'm used to. Would anyone have noticed if I had worn my sneakers? Probably not. But I felt a little more comfortable (and I got a new pair of waterproof shoes out of the weekend).

Next time, I'll remember my shoes... and my cowboy hat...

Two Good Reasons...

Reason #136 why I love my current job:

In a quick break between the downpours last week, I took a walk around campus and stopped at the student art gallery. It's a small room, with maybe 12 paintings and 8 pictures and few sculptures here and there. Nothing great... All very "art student" type stuff. But just having something like this within walking distance is incredibly cool. It's a nice way to kill 15 minutes.


Reason #137:

Free stuff!

Pat's New Gym Bag: Now with 98% less stank.

Pictures from Marathon and Cortland, NY.

From the makers of "Pancake Away"...

This summer, don't be plagued by dangerous waffle bites. Use "Waffle Off".

It's great for hiking and camping.

It's safe for the kids, and even repels disease carrying Belgian Waffles!

Dear guy down the other end of the gym shower cleaning his dong for the last 8 minutes,

Dude, it's not going to get any cleaner than that. Seriously.

Sincerely,

Pat

Coyotes

I saw a coyote in the back yard last week.

Needless to say, I was a little scared.

It was right around dusk. I was tossing some dead branches down the hill in the back yard. It saw me before I saw it.

I heard leaves rustling and I looked up. It was already taking off. All I saw was the head and tail, but it was no more than 20 feet away from me. It looked like a tan husky.

I back peddled a few steps then turned and ran. No use in hanging out to see if he was coming back.

So we get coyotes in the area. Good to know.

I am Patrick, son of Joseph, Mower of Lawns.

I just mowed our lawn for the first time (well, the front yard at least).

It felt pretty good.

I'm sure I'll be sick of this in another six weeks or so.

But for right now, I'm definitely feeling that "pride of ownership" thing.

(Editorial note - I came in and did a load of laundry after. Don't want to get too manly...)

Now more than ever...

No exercise + still eating the same amount = Pat Plus!