Trend Watch: Campus Edition

(or: Things I noticed today on my walk.)

tight jeans: in

tank tops: in

skirts: out

those stupid 3/4 length pants: in

hippie music dudes: out
(nobody wanted to hang out with any of the guys playing guitar under the tree today... Even the guy playing the tuba was off by himself (yes, there was really a guy sitting by himself playing the tuba...)).

driving around with your windows down and your stereo up as loud as it can go: in

most disturbing trend: one ear on the cell phone, the other ear on the iPod

Closing = Tomorrow.


I've got a cashier's check for the house closing tomorrow.

I asked them to do one of those giant, 4-foot lottery winner sized checks, but they told me the machine was broken.

This is why no one takes you seriously, Connecticut:

"Crazy Cat Terrorizes Connecticut Town"

I'm glad I'm secure enough in my sexuality to enjoy the benefits of a daily moisturizing routine.

The purging.

There's been a great purge at the Canole house in anticipation of moving. Anything that I haven't looked at in the last three years has been tossed out. We've shredded five trash bags worth of old documents (up until last week, I had tax returns dating back to 1994 and every check I had ever written). We've made three trips to the Salvation Army. And countless trips to the dumpster.

While the whole packing process has been somewhat stressful, I must say it feels good knowing we won't be moving all that extra crap that was just taking up space.

Basement, garage, shed.
I call thee Patopia.
King of all these lands.

Our stuff in boxes.
No room for us to walk here.
Now it's time to move.

Big Love

Thanks, HBO. We really didn't need to see Bill Paxton's naked ass three weeks in a row. We appreciate the break.

Fun fact.

A new study has shown that rolling up your sleeves and staring at yourself in the mirror for two minutes before you work out actually promotes muscle growth an extra 10%. However, the effects seem to be limited to just the biceps.

Researchers are still investigating the effects of your spotter yelling "C'MON! TWO MORE!" while you bench press.

The finger.

The cast is off. The pins are out. I've been going to "hand therapy" twice a week (I still can't say "hand therapy" without giggling...).

Now I have to learn to reuse my hand again. Therapy is hard. Much harder than I thought it would be.

However, it's awfully nice to be able to shower without a plastic bag on. So I've got that going for me.

Did you know?

Did you know that The Home Depot carries over 400 different shades of "off white" paint?

And that the differences are only perceptible by the human female?

patnormous (pat.nor.mous) adj. :

1). Great in size or girth from being unable to exercise due to an inordinate number of injuries.

2). Out of shape.

"I was going to go out for lunch today, but I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I'm starting to get patnormous, so I'm going for a walk instead."

Did you see that? That bitch cut me off!

I've checked with a few friends, and it seems to be legit, but as someone about to buy their first house, I still say "Title Insurance" sounds made up.

Cast Party

I got the cast off for about ten minutes on Tuesday. They took an x-ray, said everything looked really good and that we were coming along nicely, then put another cast right back on me. I was furious.

One more week. Grrrr.